Do You Think People Can Change?

By | January 22, 2013


We have a saying in Kuwait that roughly translates to “The tail of the dog can never go straight”. We also have another saying that also roughly translates to “A person with a habit can never shake it off”. Both saying basically state the obvious fact: a person cannot change, but is that necessarily true?

I personally believe people are capable of change. I personally am not the person I was as a child, nor the same teenager, or even twenty something girl I used to be. Time and different situations made me into another person. Not a better person, necessarily, but yes I’ve changed.

I used to torment myself about losing friends in my life. How can a person you’ve been so close to one day suddenly stop being friends and stop caring? The friendship no longer meaning anything to? If there was anything I could’ve done differently so we could stay friends but I deducted in the end that while the frienships were good at their prime time -hopefully- one or both parties in this frienship have changed and therefeore stopped being able to mainain the status quo. People grow up, get older, get tired, change interetsts, simply put: life happens and c’est la vie. We just move on.

Some, if not most people, are changed by life. Birth of a child, loss of a loved one, an illness, coming into too much money, gaining power, too many hardships and troubles, etc. Some changes are sudden and evident, others happen slowly overtime. Some people don’t want to change but the do, others desperately want to change but they can’t, not easily. Somethings are harder to change than others, the deeper and more engraved a trait is in a person’s soul the more work it takes to change it. In the end, everyone changes and I believe that each and every single person does indeed have the ability to change if they put their mind and soul into it. Plus, there is no guarantee that people surrounding you won’t change, again c’est la vie. We just move on.

What about you? Do you believe people can change? For better or worse?

10 Responses to “Do You Think People Can Change?”

  1. Newq8bride says:

    this is a sensitive topic , I do believe people change , I changed , in some parts i became much better but i noticed later that my personality changed & i became shway rude :( thanks God i noticed that and I am trying to fix that .

    Yes I lost wayed friends , but i don`t care , if i didnt do anything wrong to them . waayed klaam but i don`t know how to express it

    • danderma says:

      Be rude, its better that way. At least no one tramples over you! As for friends don’t think of it as you’ve lost them. The persons who were your friends are no longer the same hence you are not compatible any more, as simple as that. Life is filled with opportunities AND with good, honest people. You can always make new friends.

  2. Ghadeer says:

    I think in an ever-changing world, change is inevitable. Nobody can NOT change- whether in a physical, spiritual, mental sense… But whether this change is to the better or to the worse, that is up to us and in our hands.

    • danderma says:

      True. Its impossible for a person not to change. I think you are right, if a person become worse and they realize it and choose not to do anything about it, its up to them right?

  3. Jacqui says:

    The only change I believe a person goes through is growing up, maturing sometimes into something wiser or in other cases becoming soo immature and adolescent it feels like you’re dealing with a middle age crisis.

    I have changed, quite a lot since I was a young child, tween, teen, young adult, and still am a young adult! 😛 But I became less sensitive to those around me, I sort of lost a filter I used to have and the constant need to make everyone around me happy at my own expense. I don’t find that as a bad change, in fact I find that it was about time for me to go through that and I wished I had gone through it earlier but then again I wouldn’t have all this knowledge under my belt.

    Change is never entirely a bad thing, I say embrace it, but don’t go into something expecting that you can change another person because in reality the only way change can be achieved is if the other person actually wanted it as badly.

    • danderma says:

      The filter you got is not because you grew up. Its because, one situation after the other, you’ve realized its pointless to give endlessly and have nothing thrown back at you but ill intentions hence the filter. Sometimes change happens to the worse sadly but then I believe if it does and the person likes that change, who are we to tell them how to live their lives no? Everyone deserves to be happy in their own way I suppose.

  4. Mary says:

    A beautiful piece on change….saw many of the situations reflected in my own life that has made me to change…I feel I am loosing a friend at the moment due to changes……..
    I would like to put a link to your article on my facebook page…can I?

    • danderma says:

      Sure feel free to do so. Think about it this way, the friend you are losing is not the same person that you were once friends with. Its just that the friendship had run its course. So sad but don’t linger too long, look around you and enjoy the other frienships you have left.

  5. Memoq8 says:

    I belive people can change, it takes time!